Laughing through the pain

A talented Ashbourne writer whose book ‘Cornflakes for Dinner’ was published last week has a pretty grim story to tell - but Aidan Comerford tells it with such humour and positivity, it is a really side splittingly funny and uplifting read.

Life has thrown a lot of difficulties his way - his daughters were diagnosed with autism, his wife suffers with depression and on top of that he faced the real prospect of losing his home when he lost this job.
While his story seems heartbreaking, the one thing that has sustained the family through all the hard times has been a sense of humour - Aidan is a very, very funny award winning comedian and his wife, Martha Fitzpatrick is arguably funnier.
“This is not an advice book like many books you read on autism - this is about maintaining a sense of humour which can help get you through the bad times.”
Aidan is originally from Carlow town where he grew in what he describes as “a three bedroom anti masturbation device” - before the girls were born, the couple believed they had fertility problems, but Aidan was reluctant to engage in any attempts at baby making, whenever he visited his parents as he was sure “everyone in the surrounding counties” could hear the creaking floorboards.
He and Martha now have two daughters, both on the autism spectrum.
“Ailbhe is 11 and will have an independent life, but Sophie (10) is more profoundly autistic and she won’t,” he explains.
The book deals with the ‘hard weekend’, when the couple realised that both girls were on the autistic spectrum and the heartbreak, difficulties and laughs that followed.
“Ailbhe was around three at the time and Martha said to me she though she might be autistic and then we realised that they were probably both on the spectrum.
“We were referred to Enable Ireland for early intervention and in April 2009 they began therapy sessions.
The girls defied their expectation once therapy began. “Before we felt we were drowning in the s**t, but going to Enable Ireland was like a snorkel. Yes, we were still in the s**t, but at least we could breathe.”
“In 2010 they were both officially diagnosed as being on the autism spectrum and four or five days after, I lost my job.”
Aidan is a structural engineer. “My wages were being cut month after month, but eventually I lost my job. I got a new one within six months, but it was paying only half of what I had been getting in my old job. We were in serious financial trouble and we were faced with losing the house.
“Martha was suffering from post natal depression, which became chronic depression and she has a sleep condition which means she needs an excessive amount of sleep.”
With all this pressure piling on top of him, Aidan nearly had an emotional breakdown and Martha sent him away for a few days to himself to rest and have fun.
“I always loved music and starting when I was 17 or 18 years old, I had spent 10 years trying to be the next Damien Rice, but I gave up when Ailbhe was born.”
His couple of days away were spent in Galway where one of his friends pointed out that he was funny and should write funny songs.
That is exactly what Aidan did - he joined up with Ciara Williams to form ‘Guilty Folk’ and started gigging.
Una McKevitt saw them performing and asked them to join her show ‘Singlehood’ which they performed at the Dublin Fringe Festival, then in Vicar Street and the year after that in the Olympia.
“When the show came to an end I started my own musical comedy show, calling myself Aidan Strangeman.”
He entered and won the ‘So You Think You’re Funny’ competing at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival in 2014, opening doors and leading to offers of paid gigs, which were a very welcome help to the family’s struggling finances.
Previous winners of this prestigious competition include Tommy Tiernan and David O’Doherty.
He won a free tip to take part in the Just for Laughs Festival in Montreal.
However when he came home he realised Martha was really struggling and the girls needed him. He had also got a better paying job so he took the decision to give up the comedy gigs and travelling.
“I didn’t miss it for a while, but when I did, Martha suggested I join the Facebook group, Oh My God What a Complete Aisling (OMGWACA) and contribute to it.
“I started putting up posts and got a really nice reaction.
“Deirdre Nolan, who is a commissioning editor for Gill lives in Ashbourne and is a member of OMGWACA and she got in touch and I ended up with a contract to write the book.”
The family is now acting on another new adventure - their home is affected by pyrite and they will shortly be moving out to rented accommodation for three months, while remedial work takes place.
The thing that has helped the family through all their tribulations is humour.
“You can get to the point where you think you will never laugh again, but it does get better and maintaining a sense of humour helps.
“Martha is funnier than I am. She was massively helpful when I was writing the book.
“I made her read it three times and she still loves me!”
 

Cornflakes for Dinner is published by Gill Books.