'Dad is not just mam’s carer, he is the rock that supports her everyday’

From the moment he laid eyes on her in a dance hall in Kinnegad in 1978, Patsy Fagan has been devoted to his wife Elizabeth. This devotion and the incredible care he has given to her, especially since becoming her full-time carer 22 years ago, saw him named overall MS Carer of the Year for 2024.

Patsy from Ballinakill, Enfield, was nominated for the award by his daughters Eva and Karen and news that he had won the overall award came as a huge surprise to him. His proud family joined him at the Hillgrove Hotel, Monaghan, when Patsy and other award winners were recently honoured at a gala dinner.

A well-known and popular character around Enfield, Patsy is a musician and singer and is very involved in the local Enfield Comhaltas group. He has recorded songs for charity including for MS Ireland and recently penned his first song which he has now recorded.

Speaking to the Meath Chronicle, Patsy recalled the day back in 1978 that Elizabeth Sullivan from Kilcock caught his eye at a dance at Heatherville, Kinnegad, and he asked her to dance. "Something just clicked," he said and the couple have been inseparable since.

They learned afterwards that their fathers had actually worked together on the buildings in Dublin for years and that ducks the Fagans had got a few years earlier, came from the Sullivans. "I knew her ducks before I knew her," laughed Patsy.

It was about a year after they were married, that Elizabeth was diagnosed with MS.

"She had stumbled the odd time and fell. She had Bells Palsy and lost the sight in her eye but it came back. We knew there was something wrong but didn't know what it was," said Patsy.

He recalled getting a call and going to Blanchardstown Hospital where they learned that Elizabeth had MS. "The specialist told us, it is not life threatening. He said she won't be able to do all the things that normal people do and would be a good bit slower but that she would live a normal lifestyle so I was delighted with that."

It was still a huge blow at the time and of course there were lots of tears but they got on with it and Patsy said 'Liz', as he calls her, has always had a positive outlook.

"She is a great woman. She looked after the two girls. She just wasn't able to do some of the things that women take for granted with kids like big shopping trips. They were reared with MS as well and they are very good to us both."

Patsy worked on the buildings as a truck driver and hauled for Roadstone for years before he gave up work to look after Elizabeth in 2002. He said he had put on weight with all the driving and about six years ago joined Slimming World, shedding an incredible ten stone.

Looking after his wife was also his motivation for losing the weight as he wanted to be able to keep looking after her and be healthy.

Daughter Eva told how she had seen a post on social media asking for nominations for MS Carer of the year and decided to nominate her dad.

In her nomination, Eva wrote movingly about her dad and the devotion and care he shows to their mother. "Myself and my sister have grown up with MS in our lives. We have so much love and respect for our parents. We know too well the challenges that face a person with MS and also the challenges that face a carer.

"Our dad is not just my mam's carer - he is her husband and father to her children; he is the rock that supports her everyday; he is the man that loves her as much now as when they met; he is the man that never considered leaving when things were tough; he is her best friend; he is the man who is with her seven days of the week and doesn’t want to be anywhere else; he is the man who dropped everything to be with her the night before a procedure in Mullingar hospital, he did it without question as he knew she was anxious and upset; he is the man who always has my mam’s needs ahead of his; he is the man who now has a daughter with young onset Parkinson’s; he is the man who is a massive support to me as well as I take on Parkinson's."

She also wrote how her dad raises awareness of MS on a daily basis and is always talking about Liz when she is not with him.

"They are married years and to be honest, I can say with absolutely no doubt they love each other more as each year passes.

"Patsy regularly talks about the night he met Liz, and how lucky he was and still is. When he looks at her, he doesn’t see the illness she has lived with for years, he sees the woman who he met in Heatherville dance that first night. "

Patsy is also involved in the Meath branch of MS Ireland in 2012, he raised over €6,000 for Meath MS after bringing out a CD of ballad along with musician friends. He was also involved in bringing out another CD called 'Live at Boggans' where the MS Therapy Centre in Trim being one of the beneficiaries.

Patsy wrote his first song 'The local butcher' last year and recently recorded it, inspired by his local butcher Padraig Coffey. "I wrote the song after a chat with my local butcher about their demise. When I was young every town had at least one butcher's shop. Nowadays with all the big supermarkets, the local independent butcher is a thing of the past. We are lucky to still have a butchers shop in Enfield run by a local man and master butcher Padraig Coffey. If your local village still has one, please continue to support them."

In fact since Patsy wrote the song, Padraig Coffey made the difficult decision to close his retail shop 'PC Meats' last month due to reduced footfall and rising costs. However has been overwhelmed by people asking him to reopen, and has decided to open three days a week. Patsy's CD is now available for purchase in local shops.

Apart from his music, Patsy also loves his vintage tractor and is a member of the Shamrock Club in Johnstownbridge and the Castle Club in Carbury and is involved in organising vintage tractor runs